5 Following

She Reads Too Much

There are a million other things I should be doing with my time...cleaning my house, riding my motorcycle, cooking my family dinner, talking to my Mother on the phone. But I can't. I just....can't. There are too many good books to read.

Currently reading

The Forsaken (The Survivor Chronicles #3)
Erica Stevens
The Skin Map
Stephen R. Lawhead

I've Fallen and there's a Tentacle in my Butt

I've Fallen and there's a Tentacle in my Butt - Edward Naughty image

Today I learned several very interesting facts!

1. Tentacle monsters feed on sexual vibrations.
2. Sexual arousal has vibrations.
3. Tentacle monster slime smells like vanilla extract. (WTF??)
4. Severed tentacles have deep human-like emotions.
5. To best catch a runaway severed tentacle you should roam town fondling your own genitals.
6. Don't fall down around tentacle monsters.

I really don't have much to say about this. I mean, it's poorly written and full of what the fuckery. So if you like that you should enjoy this.

In case you're on the fence, here are a few teasers...

"The severed tentacle quickly escaped from the building to the outside world as Margaret witnessed its escape route. She ran out after it and jumped on the ground to grab it, but it slipped out of her hands due to its slimy exterior.

"Slippery suckers," she said, with a grin on her face, enjoying the thrill of the chase."


"The tentacle was to fast and it had a lot of stamina. It would be difficult for one person alone to outwit the creepy crawly extremity."


"The tentacles are attracted to sexual vibrations," she said. "So while you are searching for the tentacle, I would suggest you fondle your genitals to give yourself the advantage."

Everyone laughed.

"I am serious," she said, with a straight face.

Everyone stopped laughing and stiffened up.

"We need to capture the tentacle before it attaches itself to a host," she said. "If it does, then the tentacle will rapidly incubate and develop into a full tentacle creature."

"What is the host?" someone said.

"A human orifice," she said. Someone chuckled. "This is serious!" she shouted. "You may think it is funny now, but you won't if the tentacle enters one of your holes."

Everyone had a concerned look on their face. They gulped and looked at each other.

"So, I must warn you," Margaret said, smiling. "When you smell a sweet scent in the air and hear sucking and slurping, you had better cover your pie holes. "


""Oh, my pussy is so wet for you," she said. "Fuck me, now!"

Jenny immediately fell to the floor and felt a sharp pain in her ass. One of the tentacles had anchored itself into her anal cavity. Her eyes immediately dilated. She looked down and saw the tentacle embedded in her ass. More tentacles surrounded her. She screamed at the top of her lungs.

Matt rushed down the hallway back to the lab and opened the door. He looked down at Jenny in disbelief. "What is going on?" Matt shouted. "Are you OK?"

"I've fallen and there's a tentacle in my butt," Jenny whimpered. Matt slowly walked toward her. "Hold still, I'm going to get it out of you." Matt rushed over and grabbed the tentacle that was fused to her anus and tugged furiously.

"Ouch! Have you lost your mind," she said. "That hurts."

After he stopped yanking on the tentacle, another tentacle slid up his pant leg and took him to the ground as it anchored itself into his anal cavity.

"See what you've done," she said. "You've pissed them off.